the ice cream truck is coming omgomg
dude, it's 2 am.
but its COMING
Just saw remains of her puke from last night on my pants.... thats got "Apology BJ" written all over it.
Whats a good hint for stop bitching im gonna give you head
i wanted to tell my neighbors to shut up it was 4am, but listening to her rag on him for his minute man routine was actually entertaining
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Why does he only make me orgasm when I'm about to break up with him?
Bookstore boy and I went out, he came back here and I tried to fool around and he respects me too much blah blah I'm a predator.
Oh I forgot to tell u. I hit someone with my car in the RiteAid parking lot. More like a nudge.
hey you forgot your wet suit in my room you can come grab it whenever
I blacked out after you got about 8 goldfish out of the tank and put them in your pockets. We're not allowed back. It was a sucky Walmart anyway...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
he told her he was actually impressed that she had fucked more people in this house than the four dudes living in it.
I like to think it's an accomplishment that I can relate my life to a T-pain song
I apparently pulled his dick out at the bar and started yelling "DICK PICS IN REAL LIFE!"
He said "send me a motivational picture" so I sent one with mayo on my face that said "clearly I'm no stranger to white stuff on my face"...I'm the fuckingng worst
It was bad. U were calling my cat "kittiano" and playing her like a piano. Way too drunk my friend.
What's the weirdest place you've ever had sex?
I don't think you're psychologically prepared for this conversation.
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