And then I said "flip over. I want to show you something i learned in Afghanistan."
If a man's penis is referred to as "the family jewels" does that make a woman's vagina a jewelry box?
We were walking home when he passed out, we left him. Just got a call from him, hes in a jail in Canada.
dude. you ripped the mardi gras beads off the girls neck and yelled she didnt deserve them..
Are you scared? I basically plan on us looking like giant drunk skittles
mary just dropped the yahtzee dice in her wine. and shes throwin em like shes on a craps table.
hahahaha slap the bag.
Me and the guy at the liquor store are on a first name basis, college is all about networking.
Nothing gets you judged faster than having cum in your hair at the gas station.
If I had that in my pants Omg I would want a shirt made so everyone knew
fond memories of taking my pregnancy test here in this Burger King
I completely forgot about the posting of partying pics shortly after adding my gma my dad was like grandma says your all over fb but she doesn't know how to use it. Of course I'm all over her fb. She's got 6 friends I am her newsfeed
Hungover playing piano at a baptism I am the PICTURE of class I feel like I should be struck by lightning
Can you please help mom and dad? Theyre trying to figure out Skype, and its like 2 cavemen finding fire.
I broke her handcuffs. I feel like an animal.
Instead of saying hi she asked if she could touch your dick through your ski bib and NOW I understand why you wore it to the bars