She's hot and she went to Notre Dame. I want to fuck the Catholic right out of her
It smells like weed.
We are in Boulder, Everything smells like weed.
i thought i was pinching her nipple. It was her mole
I love how all these freshman girls think that they can wear what they wore last summer... freshman 15 at its skankiest
He woke up next to me, said I "wasn't naked enough" and fell back asleep. I proceeded to blow him.
She sent me a text saying she picked out 17 different Halloween costumes for our kids when they hit the age of 4... The cling factor should have me running right now but honestly I'm just curious
I think I've lost the thrill of being a slut. It's just that the newness has worn off, I think.
2048oz a keg...divide that by solo cup... comes out to 128 beers...simplifies into 5.3repeating cases...drinkable between two people
and u failed math?
In other news it turns out I like Heineken.. In a desert island kind of way
I'd apply for another job, but "staring out windows crying" is not a hot qualification right now.
Competitive oral. I'm always telling girls they are only the fourth, maybe third, best blowjob I've had. They go back down with something to prove.
Did you really just call a picture of your erect penis art?
Zach, it's Lisa from work. Was that you yeiling BALLS DEEP at me on I-25 or is it just something about me that invites that from rando creeps?
this weekend took five years off my life and what was left of my dignity
That awkward moment when you bring a guy back to your place then have to tell him you only have magnums.
Randomize
