There are Star Wars cutouts in his basement. Obi Wan Kenobe watched me give him a handjob.
How is it possible that i have sex with a guy and he makes YOU breakfast
Guys, I'm sleeping in the BOYNTON LAUNDRY ROOM. if you can, come let me out in the morning as I have no keys. I might be in the study room possibly. DON'T FORGET. I will be trapped
Oh you have a half-brother? Why that's right up my alley! Let's cause family strife
Tearing families apart since 2011.
I don't have any money, so I'm just gonna press my boobs against him for his birthday.
I can't turn off my feet"
Listen man, there's two things I know about in life: porn and sound. On a day that I'm wearing khakis, I need you to trust that I know what the fuck I'm doing.
She complimented my boobs and then told me I smelled like teddy bears before falling asleep on the floor.
Well we went from the roof to the stairwell to an air mattres. One day were going to fuck in a bed
Do you find Darth Vader masks attractive?
I couldn't read the menu. I ordered the first thing I was able to read. Don't think I ate anything. Left $20 on the table.
He called me kiddo. We can't have sex
Does your drug dealer have a printer I can use??
like, there should be nothing wrong with me wanting to watch you put on a bikini and roll around in a kiddie pool of jello
I told him it was fine and then I keyed his car.
Randomize
