Gfs sis is in town. Its awkwardly obv that we want to fuck each other.
Please advise as to how precisely ashamed I should be if I just became sexually aroused by a Harry Potter and the Half Blood Prince preview
Are you for fucking real.? He divorced me just because he got a fucking girlfriend.?!
She literally thanked me for asking before I put in her ass
This Girl Got Ghosted By Her BF Of 5 Years While On A Trip They Took For Her Birthday
he came within less than a minute of me blowing him. this was our second night hanging out in a row. for an almost 30 year old italian man, he is NOT living up to his country's reputation
All that matters is I got the megaphone home safely
he made me feel like a shish kabob. his dick was the skewer.
and you said he wasn't worth calling.
Hey, remember when Hot Stuff played in the back of the ambulance? Or no, cause of your concussion...
Can't. Busy recovering from the worst pulled muscle of my life that I got either from excessively acrobatic boning or carrying a huge fucking ice luge down the street while wearing 4 inch heels
People Are Applauding Chrissy Teigen For Getting Candid About Breast-Pumping
Fun times on public transportation. I just had a guy imply that I was racist cause I didn't want to talk to him when I was clearly reading my book and he was clearly on coke.
Do you want me to add this to the list of actions I will state at your intervention
I can't open my mouth wide enough to make full use of this snapchate update
THERE IS A MAN IN THE BATHROOM IN COLONIAL GARB GET HERE
1) break up with him. 2) feel bad. 3) fuck some other guy. 4) feel better. Boom! Life plan. You're welcome.
I found a tomato seed inside my jeans. I did not eat tomatoes
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