Is it wrong to scream your own name when about to bust?
If there was an emoticon for a sad penis, i would send it to you
For a day that started with shitting my pants, things turned out fairly well.
connan obrien reminds me of an asparagus spear
That's the last time we joust in Radio Flyer wagons after margarita night.
He thought he was drowning because he was drinking water and intentionally holding his breath. Dear god what did you get me in to.
Oh and now he's calling me Brohammed Ali.
Literally I thought my ears were pouring out blood. That high.
It's a journey
And the destination is his penis?
Precisely.
Was it fun? The night started with home made Jager and ended in him falling out of a tree with a pocket full of house numbers...you tell me.
Please brint me miilk. I am on the floor but my door is open. Thank you, i appreciate u verry much.
I was behind him snuggling, I told him I was the big spoon and he told me I was too little it was more like he was wearing a backpack.
So do I get to ride the beginning of the November stache or what?
my roommate had drunk sex above me in our bunk bed and then built me a fort to apologize the next day
i believe in u and ur pee
No I didn't say it was safe, I said it was legal. I didn't say anything about it being safe. It's not my fault if you weren't listening properly.
Randomize
