I cant believe we actually had a nipple party!
hows that letter of apology to the waitress at waffle house coming?
I probably wouldn't hook up with him if I had to deal with more than his penis. i think cumulatively we are up to a minute of actual conversation this week.
She stared for a good 10 seconds before calling my dick "awe-inspiring", and then proceded to give me blueballs. All in all the ego boost made my night break even
then he compared my vagina to a dishwasher. A DISHWASHER?!
I vaguely remember walking down the highstreet with a plate of K offering lines to passers buy. I sold a line to a taxi driver.
I'll report later on the progress of the mountain orgy
He threw up in a cup in the limo and when he got out the bouncer told him he couldn't bring drinks in so he gave the glass to that dumb girl we brought with us from c street.
I know, she tried to drink it
He broke hus nose arm jousting with the traffic cones... We need to make head shots illegal or get helmets or something
I don't text first unless I'm hammered...so ya I text first a lot
I just did a Kegel and my back popped. My vagina is a gift to penises everywhere.
She found my wedding ring, sallowed it and wished me good luck explaining it to my wife before walking out. Now what?
I am honored my friend, to hold the decision of what enters your body
Fighting the urge to throw up all over my little brothers jr high basketball bench. Welcome home aaron
Finding my pants in the morning should not make me this proud
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