I'm laying in your front yard are you home
Yeah. I hotboxed a windbreaker.
i decided i am going on the Justin Bobby plan for success. Don't cut my hair for a year, don't shave for a month, land Audrina Patridge. Game on.
why is allison so mad at me??
me and her walked into dans and you yelled "hello my dear alli, you're looking mighty overweight today!".
crap..
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
im trying not to drink and cry in the same night anymore. i'll let you know how it goes
#1 lesson to be learned from mardi gras this year: lock your car doors or some grimy dude like me might just bang in it and use your backseat as a kleenex
handjobs have no place on a baseball diamond
I saw him walking to campus with his beer in his hand in the same sweats he wore walking to campus with a beer in his hand yesterday.
Lol. Awesome. Seriously though, I need you focused next year. We're gone have a lot of drinking and stupid nonsense to do, and I don't want dumb shit like responsibility to get in my fucking way.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Idk. I was speaking metaphorically. Go for it. As one of your bad decisions, I feel confident in saying you've done worse.
Is eating a dinner of fishsticks and gin mean you're failing at adulthood? I'm asking for a friend.
I just used a gift card from my in-laws to buy their daughter a vibrator. What even are morals?
did u drive by my house last night?
bc if that wasn't you i threw my bourbon bottle at the wrong van
honestly the most stressful part of moving is the chance my mom will find my vibrator
I hate her so much I want to fuck her boyfriend.
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