at some point to night u and I have a 'meeting' too...(1-737): I hope so
you really need to stop walk of shaming home from theme parties.
i've lived in the woods for so long, as long as its post-op, i don't care.
is there a legit reason for the weird voicemail I got at 2:14am?all I could make out was 'help me' 'two hours' and 'toilet butt'. wtf did u drink.
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still finding ketchup in my shoes. thanks to graduation that is probably the last time ill ever say that..
look at his last status update. 3:41 a.m. "i love u and miss u already egg burrito. happy trails friend." OF COURSE HE SMOKES POT.
Periouds do not concern me. Biploogival needs are buological needs.
I come back home for break and my room is full of weed either my parents really love me or they are having more fun then I am in college
I just opened a pickle jar stoned as fuck. I clapped for myself. I feel like wonder woman.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I keep having dreams where I tie him up and eat cookies off of him while riding him. Wtf brain.
drunk snapchatting is the worst, because i woke up with great pictures of my tits saved to my memories and no idea who i sent them to
Haha I'M GOING TO MISS HIS PENIS SO MUCH. But not his bipolarness.
3.5 bazillion penises. So not that hard to find a new good one
Relax
It's hard to relax when a woman is waxing your asshole.
Decided to smoke a bowl in my closet while my parents are gone. Just sat in the closet because I couldn't remember how to get out. Started panicking cuz I thought they were gonna show up... Checked my phone. It's been 4 minutes.
I've got a tequila scented hand sanitizer for you.
you're the best roommate i could ever have.
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