But do you think a lot of ppl use facebook as a masturbation supplement to porn?
Let me make clear that I am not a facebook masturbator
I got chris browned last night
Kanye's agent is the only person whose job sucks worse than mine.
college drinking is stealing all my money, thank god planned parenthood is somewhat free
Dont judge me. Him and his friends got me drunk for free, the least i could do was suck his dick
His beard is glorious and he smells like barbecue. Introduce me to him.
I feel like I can hear facebook. What did we smoke?
Maybe I'm a robot.
You can't be that drunk already
A drank guy in the ER just sang Trouble to me and when he sang 'Lying on the cold hard ground' he threw himself onto the ground and landed on the wrist he'd just broken. Thirsty Thursday is weird already and it's not even 5.
Yeah..I guess you know your hair looks like shit when TSA asks to inspect it
Shirley Temple died. We owe it to her to get dirty shirley wasted.
My dad lost his bandaid somewhere in the turkey. It was a mixture of thanksgiving and an Easter egg hunt
LEAVE ME AND MY NIPPLES ALONE
Im including "no monologues past 1am" in the list of apartment rules. Theatre majors dude.
MY BUTT IS BIG ENOUGH FOR AN ANACONDA AND HE DOESNT GET TO ENJOY IT TOUGH SHIT
Randomize
