Yea...but the guy who is beating me has a ponytail. So actually, I'm the winner here.
I'm gonna have to fantasize about her dying just to get off.
Fake an illness. Her and her friends are like the female version of guys who wear tapout shirts
Party Liz is going to have to have her wings clipped until someone gets me some baby reins to wear
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
AND FUCKING MGMT JUST CAME ON. CAN I GO DROWN MYSELF IN LESBIANS OR SOMETHING? IS IT TIME TO LESBIAN
we're fated to lesbian
Hahahaha who is sleeping in the garage on our beer pong table?
Maybe you need to change your pickup move. The "hey check these out" titty flash gets you the wrong kinda man.
He tried to convince me that it wasn't really that small and all he had to do was pull back the groin fat. It was still small.
All I see when I think of you are dancing penis angels around your head.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Next time I feel awkward in a situation I'm going to just yell "free bird!!!!" Like some redneck at lynyrd skynyrd show
Apparently I showed all your grooms men my vagina to prove I did not have underwear on. Awesome
Like 50% of me thinks it'll be weird, 25% of me is curious & 25% of me is horny
There's not really an emoticon that says "I'm sorry I honked your boobs, and that you weren't a fan of that."
Good news. His dicks gotten wayy bigger since high school. I love Thanksgiving break.
Be quiet or buzz aldrin will come beat you up with science
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