I cont stop tolking in a british axsent
I'm exhausted and I have velveeta stuck in my teeth
Did you eat out Derrek's girlfriend again?
there's only 1 girl at Mount St Mary that's a virgin. the Mary statue standing outside
she both took care of me and took advantage of me. it was BEAUTIFUL.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You should imdb "mourning wood" to see what I'm doing with my $80,000 English degree today
my grandpa is going down the line on this prom picture, and telling me how big everyone's nipples are... he was spot on for me.
I might have been the first person to be rolling balls at a referee seminar
If this were a real emergency kilted men wielding claymores and riding giant badgers would hve rescued said Guinness. So clearly this is just a hypothetical
I just wrote a love letter to my weed and texted it to my cousin. I can't say it any differently. It happened.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If I were better looking, this would be the point where I'd resign myself to stripping.
Cant leave im designed bacon maker you come here
Fuck you and your fucking taquito's.
Cooked. Eating pizza. Didn't have a napkin so I took my shirt off and I'm using it.
I have to choose between charging my phone or my vibrator. This is bullshit.
You weren't singing into a microphone in front of an audience. You were screaming into your fist in the check-out aisle in Walmart.
Randomize