I like complaining with weaving words and complex sentences. It makes me seem more sophisticated and less bitchy.
Well ya in hindsight obviously offering the cop a jello shot was a bad idea
1 month til my stepdad becomes a u.s. citizen, so if you want to get in on the divorce pool its your last chance, $5 a square.
Just hit him with your car. I can guarantee he won't do it again.
I don't want to get into details but it feels like there was a bear mauling involved. A very good bear mauling.
By the way, just opened the browser on my phone for the first time today... And it was it the "images" section of "who invented ass fucking"
So thanks for that
Interesting occurrence: the application I use to keep track of my periods and sexual encounters just notified me it had been over 4 months since you were logged as an active partner and ask if I'd like to remove you from my options. Wow, kmsl.
He's like a computer from 2001 in a 2014 world. It just doesn't work. Lots of glitches.
Wow. Memory lane. What a horrendously unsightly jizz stain on the tapestry of life.
Taco Bell is giving high school kids free tacos STEAL YOUR BROTHER'S WALLET I'LL BRING THE WEED.
Like I said, all hypothetical...unless, of course, you'd be into that. My heart may skip a beat.
I forgot to respond before, I was apologizing for confusing sex with secret Santa.
you were acting out moves from the wwe, in a dress. then you sceamed "you can't see me" and ran out of the apt.
Of course my parents remember you. You showed them your tits
They were shocked that I could handle my liquor so well. I'm half Irish and half Russian. This is what I'm made for
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