no more stoned jack in the box. this is the third night in a row.
erin looks like she hung out with the sham wow guy last night. she's got the beat up hooker look goin' on
turns out the website for Dick's Sporting goods is not "dicks.com". It was a win either way.
Why did 20 jello shots in a row sound like a good idea last night?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You're cordially invited to the love nest for alcoholic and aquatic adventures. Also known as an all expense paid trip to my pool, alcohol, and vagina.
You left me on the phone while you grabbed a plastic bag and started puking. I recorded it. Its my new ringtone for you
I got woken up by a construction worker, turns out I was laying in a hallway, naked and wrapped in a matress pad. To answer your question no, I did not study for this test I got David Hasselhoff drunk
I don't think I even want to know why you are sending my husband pictures of your nutsack.
Just dodged a state trooper, your weed will be there shortly. Fear the unbustable!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
There's always a silver lining when massive voluptuous tits are involved
Cocaine is ok on a cleanse, right?
this periodpocalypse needs to be over. I need head
One of your 'guests' left her bra in the kitchen.
Dude, does it look like any of the women I bring home wear bras?
A true gentleman never tells. But yes, I did indeed get laid last night
I lysoled the money\n(631): wrong text lmao
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