my mouth tastes like poor choices
Just washed my feet between classes in the bathroom...Four girls totally judged me...
If we have to be apart I understand. Being separated is probably best for our relationship now. I look forward to our booty calls.
The twins are whispering in turkish together. I think I did something bad last night.
Is it horrible that I want to keep my purple landing strip until after my gyno apt? I feel like someone beside myself should see it...
It's christmas eve and my mom blacked out before me. If she beat me at that, what have I been learning at college?
I am currently watching him baptize himself in a baby pool with a handle of belvedere while wearing a coral dress.
I want to have sex with him.
"The cab driver felt bad for us so he stopped to buy us chocolates. That counts as a valentine!"
I'm dressed in all sequins still at 9:30 in the morning and the worst part is that I actually still fit in in Vegas
You might be at the point of severe desperation when you gotta hold the two pieces of your broken vibrator together just to get off.
He drops f bombs like every other word and he just gave me 127 shares of tmobile stock for free. I feel like I should pay him back in blow jobs or something.
I was walking out the front door and heard his roomate say "It looks like you need a chiropractor." I think my work here is done.
Below this exterior of ice is a layer of cum. Followed by a pool of gin. More cum. Then, finally a heart.
what do you mean i can't make cookies with a blow dryer? challenge accepted.
My drug dealer was just on ESPN..
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