Forget about socially acceptable. Make me happy instead
i had just passed the point of no return when my mom opened my door. I hid my dick and took the porn off the computer in time but i still had to explain my day at school to her WHILE i was jizzing in my pants.
You know your in college when you decide house chores with games of beer pong...
You know you are bi when you flip between the NFL Network and LOGO.
We are two peas in an std pod
The cops busted down the door and everyone ran. I was just trying to find my shirt before I got arrested
Brian got his first ever blow job last night. We should make him a scrapbook.
came home to a trail of roses from the door halfway up the stairs. but my nonsingle roommate lives downstairs. idk if they celebrated on the stairs or if some girl tried to woo me last night and i don't remember
I dont even think your gonna like what I got you for christmas. If not we can take it back and get drugs.
Andy was trying to screw his door shut from the inside so no one could get in.
I'm still laying in bed cuz I don't feel like adulting yet
He was so energetic. It was like screwing a bunny.
I feel like you're the sexual bearcat I've always wanted to be.
Dammit. the window insulation sheets are too small for my windows. Yet again I am disappointed by size
...blackout vacation is awesome. Where did you end up? I think i'm in Miami.
Hospital.
Randomize
