We've started doing pot butter shots. WHY AREN'T U HERE
I walked out of the store holding my face and a lady pulled her daughter away from me as I then threwup in the parking lot
Ok well I'll be up all night studying if you need a wake up call or a place to put your penis.
chimney cleaner pole that expands when button is pushed then pull out. Remember that. We have to patent it.
Who are you high with right now?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Which one of you fuckers thought itd be funny to see if the kitchen table can float.
I also like to call Halloween "Mystery Fuck Day"
I just told him I want him to "take the reins". At least its festive sexting?
You don't know how badly I want to just hold you as a soup spoon holds a bisque
just got caught singing "pop that pussy" by a very old man at work. *face palm*
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She went to her drug test stoned.
And strangely enough, we all know she'll pass it.
I dealt with the imported moonshine, but when the cocaine came out, I had to get the fuck out of there
We hooked up in his car and afterwards he cried. I think I need to find a new hookup...
earned some solid air miles from the plan B I just bought. #silverlinings
we went book shopping, so yes this relationship is going to be about more than sex
you walked into the party, and all you had on was your left sock... literally.
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