Homeslice needs to figure out he's so 2006
atleast your grandma didn't give you her USED dildo just so you wouldn't have sex.
I can make a handprint turkey for extra credit in history. I feel like the word college should be in quotes on the school letterhead.
High as balls & about to be tanning. Helloooo 15 minute vacay.
All I know is that it's pretty damn mean to put a glass wall in a bar.
Never again. I promise. My old gay body can't handle that much adrenaline twice.
I was throwing up in the shower. He was throwing up on me. It was a cute couple moment for us.
I just realized I'm the burger in your burger and steak anology. Very disconcerting.
Can you explain the plethora of sunflower seeds in the dryer?
I just need like a magic vacuum to suck everything out of me and then an IV to put good stuff back in
She's cool and all but if she eats my food again I'm gonna fucking drop kick her ass. No one touches my lunchables. NO ONE.
She called to say the cops were not fake cops. some one has to go get her in an hour
Thanks for the bagel and the sex.
Poor guy. Tried so hard to get out of the friend zone. I had to make out with someone in front of him to put him in his place.
so evidently blowing a guy does not mean he will say hi to you when he sees you in class.. in case you're ever wondering
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