You don't get off work for this? I feel genuinely bad for you.
I'll have a beer when I get into the office. Yes, I hide beer in my work frige.
...seriously? chocolate pudding? motorboating? No one has even done that to ME and i am 69 times the whore you are
The problem with having your drunkeness documented at a wedding is not only does it show up all over facebook, but all over professional photography websites.
I lost my phone so I put sticky notes all over my roommates body asking her to wake me up at 7:00 AM.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I thought he was kidding when he said pretend to be a dunkin donut delivery women. This is the last time I ever role play.
you're being stingy. if you didnt want people to have sex on your couch, you shouldve specifically said so.
That's the kind of break up sex that keeps couples together. Damn.
you really cant fit homeless dj into your budget? doubles as charity
You can't mix blow jobs, bacon, and Star Wars.
A) just did. And b-z) that sounds like a great Sunday morning.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dude! We had to write our address on your arm in permanent marker so you wouldn't get lost. You just showed the cabbie your arm and he drove you! Nice guy.
The hospital waiting room is starting to become a very familiar place to me.
DICK-CITY HERE WE COME
Who died my cat blue again?
Remind me to tell you about how I hit a tree with my car last night.
I'll be glad to.
Definitely didn't just make out with a guy the same height as me just because we wanted to see what it would be like to not have to reach up....
Randomize