Did you read the article making fun of the right wing extremists? How they organized this 'tea party', and to propagate it they would mail teabags to their senators? And it became a verb...they had posters saying 'teabag obama!' yeah...
A message to Mrs Obama perhaps?
not only are you not the girl i fell in love with, but from the looks of it, you ate her
boyfriend # 1 is in the bathroom and boyfriend # 2 is ringing the doorbell need back up this is not a drill i repeat this is not a drill
when you tell me you got me a birthday present, I have to assume it will show up in a drug test.
Do you think the neighbors will know I was the one giving out the penis shaped lollipops to the children?
My dad picked me up from the bus station and as soon as he saw me he yelled "bus backwards is SUB!" and started laughing, I'm like 800% sure he's stoned. I'm so happy I came home for spring break.
Ok: all ex-gfs except you from the last 5 years have or are about to have a baby...be on the lookout...
You would seriously think I would remember who put themselves in my phone as Burt Rynalds Moustache, but I don't. And I need to be reminded of who you are so I can give you a proper high five.
Started my day with puking in a trash can.... Its gonna be a beautiful day
According to my Fitbit I was passed out in my car for 2 hours after she got us kicked out of the bar
Dude she literally licked him. He was covered in cheese and in her high state what else was she gonna do?
I enjoy the company of your penis
When do you estimate your next shower will be? Several people have asked.
raging hangover at work with a lunchable dreaming of the sex ill never have. my life is perfect.
all I know is that I was naked, and there were cheeto puffs everywhere...
Randomize
