So I'm stoned for 420, and have an eye doctor appointment in fifteen minutes
Are your eyes okay
I mean if I was Asian they would be
Telling her that my penis is called megatron was not a good idea for a first date.
Three 40's of Mickeys, is no excuse to be naked at Baskin Robins.
The drink u got me is pineapple something w. Cigarete ashes in it.ima drink it anyway
dude.. you lit a cigarette on the bus and told the driver it was okay because you were fire marshall of your boy scout troop
Could you explain why there is an Australian passport in your toilet?
UD be completely fine. you don't lose control just keep a positive environment. for example i really want to lick the wall cause red is delicious but i don't have to.
I think i can make this amish girl legitimately hot.
We ended up getting arrested after we flagged down the cops for a ride home with open beers in our hands... turns out the "nobody told me" excuse doesn't cut it anymore
Yes. Yes. Double yes. I'll bring the tits. You bring the frosting.
I think he's having people over to watch him get way too drunk again
be proud. or at least amused. an 18 yr old and a 25 yr old at least makes my average hookup age this week the same as my age.
Is it rude to ask for an autograph after giving him a blowjob in their hotel's hot tub?
You came into my room and started rubbing a banana on your face.
Noted. Next time you want to get fried chicken and cocaine.
Ok. That just sounds baller.
Randomize
