When we ran out of red solo cups we switched to Starbucks cups for beer pong... Who doesn't want to live in Seattle?
I think "banned from Amtrak due to excessive projectile vomiting" would sum up the evening quite nicely.
I have a busted ear drum from when he honked his horn when we started to have sex on his car in the parking lot...
Bring my gorilla suit and my bong.
Oh its going to be that type of weekend?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I figure that my generation of my family needs an alcoholic. I'll take that burden.
If he thinks that that is an acceptable way to ask me out he is out his goddamn ginger mindddddd.
after he went down on me he said he wanted an air freshener for his car scented like my vag. i cant even.
If you've never been partying there before, take Shae with you. Drunk Shae is like a GPS. She found us the only bottle shop still open at four, a pot dealer, and told us all which subway to take to get home. She'd never been to Madrid before. It was awesome.
You know I love you. I just don't love your penis.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Um ... did I have a lizard on my shoulder last night at the bar?
he sent me the greatest dick pic I've ever received.
he actually took the time to cut a fingertip off of a glove then put it on his dick like a beanie. he called it hipster dick.
Aaaaaaaand dick pic. God bless america, and god bless tinder.
I'm so jealous of your sex life. You know it's awesome when thinking about the sex you had last night brings you tears of joy.
I'm pants less watching buffy the vampire slayer drinking rum. I'm not that hard to impress
What's the policy on calling guys who have kids daddy...
Randomize