she said i was amazing, then i left to room to take the rubber off and came back to find her masturbating with my xbox controller while niko got a call from roman.
Listening to her yell about my drinking problem is not helping my hangover.
I just asked the contractor building my house what it would cost to put a garbage disposal in all the shower drains...there was a lot of judging going on.
I love you. Thanks for all the blowjobs.
it's not like i was drunk to the point of NEEDING help...i just wanted someone to offer to hold my hair or something.
Well were gunna have to wash the couch cover now...maybe even the couch, soap or fire your decision
He stumbled out of the bar bathroom at 3:30 am with his jeans unzipped and his dick hanging out - it was the physical manifestation of "blackout with your cock out"
BGSU move in weekend. Just passed a house w a beer pong table set up, ppl already playing, girls holding signs that say "son drop off". It's 10:30 am.
I don't know if I want to live in a world where i can't fuck an exes brother.
So what are you going to be for halloween?
A woman sitting on her couch watching Hocus Pocus.
See this is where I mess up.. I get distracted by the option of consistent sex and free beer
I woke up, topless, my car was parked funny so I threw on my hoodieto go fix it and found a jello shot in my pocket. where did I go last night?!
Sometimes, it’s important to take a moment and kinkshame yourself.
yeah i ran into him at the bar at 11pm. he started talking about engineering and the next thing i know it's 4am and i'm naked on top of him.
You should not be involved with someone who smells like that. Because that smell seriously does not go away. Even if you can't actually smell it at any given point, it will still haunt you
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