Sorry about teling your dad i'd have sex with him last night in front of your mom while i was drunk
Just found a hundred dollar bill on the ground. Hope you're looking to drink tonight
she pinky promised me she was 18
The prescription for my birth control just blew away in the wind on my way back from the health center. It's like god wants me to get pregnant
25 Hilarious ‘Sex Clubs’ You Should Try To Join
I am so 35 right now. Listening to REM, drinking red wine, and crying over an article about ecstasy in oprah magazine.
I don't know what you're talking about but its dick galore in the tub. We will be getting poked tonight. Bring forks.
Yeah. I stopped her before she flashed the guy for a free slice of pizza. She called me a gentleman and then before I knew it she was in my bed.
I'm in a waiting room at the hospital - and there's a dude here who is WAY too proud of his urine sample.
I don't give a shit if she's homeless, if you're gunna live outside el pollo loco and act like a bitch I'm squirting you with my water bottle
These 23 People Had Crazy Sex With Complete Strangers
It was close. I was the girl scoping out where all the garbage cans were located in the class just in case.
This is why you don't heavily drink before 2 midterms.
There is a chick at the bar in a bumble bee onesie, complete with wings. Yeah, I must be back in Seattle.
Yeah, you went up to him and said "I stare at people until they feel obligated to talk to me."
Showed up to family party blacked out and in a turkey costume. I'd say thanksgiving was a success.
I was giving him a handjob in the woods and a family walked by
Terrible idea I love it