I'd suck a dick for hot wings now. A metaphoric dick that is
I've been sucking dick for sushi for weeks now...hasn't worked yet :P
too bad being hungover isnt a job. just threw up from 9am to 5pm
he thought he was parachuting out of a plane... talk about a bad trip.
Oh btw, my mom called... you made the police blotter in the newspaper. Don't worry, she's mailng me a copy so I can put in on the fridge.
I need to have sex with you on our hotel room window ledge... This is a need not a request.
So essentially hes paying me $150k/year for the rest of his career to not have sex
SERIOUSLY? WTF! why cant I find a super hot, super gay, super conservative christian NFL player in need of a beard?
if i bang your brother are we still cool?
Not only does DQ have s'mores shakes, sonic has a hot dog in a pretzel bun, and Wendy's has a burger in a pretzel bun. Important things are happening.
Somehow she is more off limits now than when she was his girlfriend
stop fucking thinking about him when there is A MILLION OTHER PENISES TO RIDE IN THE WORLD
If you think eating a bowl of leftover stuffing and drinking champagne from the bottle in dirty sweats at 9am is sexy... Then yeah, I'm your girl.
I am now banned from the bar... Because you got head from my ex in the woman's restroom
i've got three words. i. was. spanked.
You asked him if he would have sex with you under the dinosaur. He declined and then you started crying, blaming the sand.
I put him in the supply closet, used the copy paper to build a fort around him and his wheelchair, then he fucked me in the fort.
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