I am not having having sex with guys at the moment.
I can pretend to be a girl if you want. I have a tongue.
all i remember is screaming butter knifes are for pussies.
His parents had a bottle of captain morgan on the table for me when I went for dinner. I feel accepted
Rent Disney Oceans. Smoke a bowl. Fast forward to the seal section. Then call me.
There is nothing scarier than watching yourself breathe in the mirror while on shrooms.
Girl just walked into the bar with a T-shirt that says "I'm not Irish, kiss me anyways." Target aquired.
I do wanna see you. And we can just lay here and watch a movie and listen to me cry.
He was just lying on the living room floor watching Star Wars with six empty pack of cigarettes and two empty cases of beer.
In his defence I guess I did take the bed, couch and dining room set in the breakup.
wearing the bible to the ABC party, thought you'd appreciate that.
Now that mom and dad sold the camper, do you think it's okay to talk about all the sex I had in it?
He can't just hit it and quit it and then eat your pop tarts on his way out.
The thing I'm gonna miss about him is his dick.
Well, I turned down sex again. This is guy #5 in the past 2 weeks. My vagina is going to seek emancipation.
You'd think that a rotation of two 30 year old men could keep me satisfied... WHY ISN'T THERE A MAN THAT CAN KEEP UP WITH MY HEALTHY SEXUAL APPETITE?!
I'm going to use this quarantine time to improve my blowjob skills.
Randomize
