i barfeds in our rink
that cunt stole my fb status. SHE'S NOT THAT FUNNY
She thought I was gay, so I told her I'd be more comfortable with anal. She agreed.
We should have parties more often. I ended up with 90 beers and someone cleaned my toilet.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Is it ironic that the girl with the horse face is also on the equestrian team?
Can you pinpoint the moment you decided it was acceptable to trade blow jobs for beers or was it a gradual slide?
The bartender from Thursday remembered me... And gave me a FLAMING BUCKET of alcohol.
I still can't believe you had sex with someone who willingly went by Peaches.
Whatever the emoticon is for "balls deep". That.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
you said "i met the love of my life tonight" and i said "me?" and you said "no, hummus"
Let me rub your butt and eat French fries from your mouth and dip them in your ketchup filled belly button.
I have an interview tomorrow! The couple we regularly swing with said I could use them as references. Winning
...take a good look at your butthole.... then try matching it to any paint color on the Benjamin Moore color wheel....not gonna happen...
tell raye i said hi and sorry for bleeding on the limes
i think i'm just going to start having sex with his brother, he's much hotter and it would definately be less illegal.
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