Is making out on a toilet while he is sitting down and pissing weird? cause that's what happened last night
My cousin just told me i smelled good. She must like the smell of cum.
whore
Only my sister would update her facebook status while going into labor.
Tell us when you see the semi truck on fire.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Almost accidentally stole a baby... explain later
just saw someone whip out a flask during lecture... I think I found a study partner
I thought of you while cleaning the forehead prints off my glass doors.
bringing a ziploc bag full of Jim Beam to the movies may not have been the best idea.
Um...any recollection of peeing in the pantry
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I may or may not already be in your hot tub when you get home. I have a key to your house and no shame.
Seriously just told the plant the cheese Pringles are mine.
We have an albino peacock in our apartment. It's beautiful.
Scratch it being beautiful, bitch just stole my McDonalds. Call animal control.
I'm mainly pissed because I shaved fucking EVERYTHING for this. WITH SHAVING CREAM. Men do not appreciate how rarely that happens.
That's just how I roll. I drink, then tell people I'm either not wearing underwear or I'm training to be a stripper.
Like how do you live your life and have never made a grilled cheese? The audacity of some people
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