I know it's VERY late and i know i may have burdened you, but on the chance that it's sat nite- are you up or willing to be? Christinas camping and i'm chillin alone.
you'd be alarmed at how much plan b i just found in mom's bathroom...
Also we decided you're the person whose going to die at my bachelor party...do the math you're the most logical choice
Just had sex with your cousin. That's what you get for throwing away a perfectly good microwave. Hopefully you learned from this experience.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
the party has pretty much ended, it's just 20ish of us jumping and grinding to music from some guy's phone in the corner.
As soon as they started using chocolate milk as a chaser for captain Morgan, I thought l it'd be best to leave.
We have bigger issues at hand... Does anybody know someone in the kalamazoo area that is missing a pair of stilts ?
Eating a chocolate bar and crying over a cobweb. Life is beautiful and I love shrooms.
Just yelled out loud for someone to buy me a drink, 30 seconds later random guy on grindr asks what I'm drinking.
There's a 98% chance your drink will taste like rohypnol
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I feel like we have a good system here turning our sketchy decisions into great stories.
My walk of shame turned into having to get his dad to tow my best friends car out of the snowbank in his driveway
B. I found a note on my phone and all it says is 'Fuck yeah im a racecar'
Is it too much to ask for 10 minutes of privacy while I masturbate?
I'm praying to the gods of sex we both get laid this weekend. Amen. Love you
If it makes you feel better he's in the stall next to me and I'm taking a diabolical shit. He's complaining
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