whats up tonight?
Ice cream, wine, and teabags... Not the earl grey kind
Tonight has been like a good ass fucking high school movie
Just set all my clocks a minute apart. Now my 4:20 is longer by sixfold
I dont know why people are racist. Both the mexicans and the irish gave us holidays where everyone drinks on a wednesday.
Dude how the fuck are we gonna get the lawnmower outta the pool?
They got a 10 foot tall beach ball from the roof of a McDonalds. Get the fuck over here.
have to get expensive furniture. after that study abroad now at least six things at ikea are named after guys i slept with
we've had our differences but let's set them aside, go home and fuck
I mean there is a rehab there so its gotta be a good time
Well that's my green light to bang ur brother. Its not real til its on fb
It was like something out of a fucked up fairy tale. He just crowdsurfed over to her while riding a keg, said "come sail with me", and then the crowd carried them off into the night. What.
I am an advanced cybernetic robot sent back in time to 2013 to fuck my wife senseless for hours on end. Have you seen this wife?
Eddy, if you don't want to roll play then say so. This is just obnoxious
But I do cardio so I don't get winded during sex really it's not like I'm trying to lose weight
My boobs just got me out of my third ticket last night
i'm so proud. i woke up to nearly seven feet of basketball player in my bed this morning
you win. again.
We've been here for 9 days, so of course I am high at my in-laws' house.
Randomize
