woke up in a freezing tub of water at 6 am again. probably should stop the drunk baths
i feel like my eyelids need a kick stand.
Just saw a white bronco on my way home from work and the license plate said "NOT OJ"
I woke up to him eating me out, listening to classical music.
Then he showed me his sketchbook. Every drawing was a hand in different 'fingering positions'. Dear JESUS.
I no longer see him as a simple set of male genitalia attached to a very sexy body. The title "trophy fuck" seems wrong. Damn.
I had to drink a couple beers this morning so I could attend the keg race. Hangover had to dissipate or it wasn't happening.
I miss you more than I would miss junk food if I went on a diet. And you've seen me eat, you know how desperate I'd be.
He woke me up at 5am to recite nursery rhymes to our fictitious unborn child.
It sucks laughing and vomiting at the same time, trust me. I kind of remember
didn't realize her mom was home while we were fucking, but she's oddly okay with it. she made us food afterwards. but then kept talking about having grand kids the whole time. is it time to bail?
The only people in the library at 5:00 on the friday after finals are homeless or pre-med.
You're the horniest male I have ever encountered
Makes it sound like you're a scientist documenting your discoveries. I warned you.
She ran from her surprise party screaming "I'm not ready for an intervention." Yeah, the girl has a problem.
Do you know how many guys' fantasies I've been told I'm a part of lately?!
Just 2. But still.
Randomize
