Told my mom a bit ago she'd meet you tonight
Um...??
She's excited
it was terrible. i could've done a better job by myself.
Of course im so fucked up sarah. I fight away tornadoes.
I think you came in my ear last night and I had to pick it out infront of my kids in class today
so we were pounding it out and someone knocked on the wall and was shouting at us
that didnt stop you
nope
girls just need to accept the fact that i'm going to make out with their boyfriends
is drinking for groundhog day legit?
well you blacked out on MLK day and we pregamed arbor day, so yes
Omg just woke up. 6am. random apartment. broad daylight. bunch of ppl doin coke around me. Theres a bridge nearby. I think my dentist is down the block. Oof.
Alone. In an inflatable pool. Drinking vodka and raspberry lemonade. I don't need approval as much as I need to know you love me still.
Not sure how I feel about St Psts and March Madness being on the same weekend. I feel like I've been screwed out of a drunk holiday.
In his defense he just bought a bong like a week ago so he's still in that honeymoon phase.
I only think it appropriate to apologize for making out with your next boyfriend. It won't happen again.
I told you in the isle if you get the one that vibrates that I masturbating with it. Your fault.
Bullshit. You owe me a toothbrush.
too bad I'd hit a car before I'd hit a bush.
Are we talking about jumping from windows or your willingness to fuck a car instead of a woman?
I'm glad you threw up in my bed because now we talk.
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