Why don't you ever send me any naked pics
i just spit dirty mouth water on my dentist. and apparently grinning sheepishly and saying "my b" doesn't make it better
Y do pigs give u trufles on farmville? I WANT BACON YOU FUCKING PIG!
I figured he was gay when I walked in on him working out to Flirty Girl Fitness.
Nada. Shooting off confetti and wanted to see I'd u could see it from ur house.
Wow. Its not even 11am.
I hid drinks in her bathroom closet.... like a squirrel... a squirrel who knew she was going to get cut off soon
Just had the weirdest flashback. Did we buy melon, take it into the restaurant and try to make them give it to us as dessert?
Found your dick twin last night
I'm currently sitting on the floor of a hostel reception area taking swigs of straight vodka, singing with people whose English doesn't go far beyond Lion King songs. I thought you might appreciate it.
I have 4 passes to the spa here, walking around with a robe on and putting cucumber slices on my penis. You guys should come hang out here. It's very relaxing
Operation: 12 Dick pics of Christmas was a sweeping success, thanks for asking!
99% of the contents of my handbag are ketchup packets and condoms. I feel that says a lot about me as a person.
I just saw a guy walking up the stairs with his dick out his pants. I let him know, and he just looked down in shock, laughed, and continued walking up the stairs.
Vagina status: the swelling is going down.
Apparently i disappeared and no one found me until the morning , but i have fifty missed calls
Randomize
