watching a depressing episode of spongebob while high is the most depressing thing i have ever experienced
i wish exes would disappear into a world where we never have to deal with them again, and they can just create drama for each other. Then if they wanted to talk to us, they would have to apply to get a "visa" to come back to our world.
girl next to me is signing up for tough love. definitely getting laid.
she's into porn, im staying here tonight
bring money and cleavage
All I can think about is getting a lawsuit and chocolate
Judging by the amount of alcohol multiplied by the amount of her exes here, tonight will be ending in tears.
We probably shouldn't have forced that guys cat to drink the grey goose while we were doing lines in his bathroom
Right now, there's some ten year old kid getting ready to go outside and play basketball. He will soon find out his basketball hoop was no match for my car.
Swish.
Should I get the rainbow boxer breifs???
As your boyfriend, this is a level of gay that even I can't handle.
I caught a glimpse of his penis. I can only imagine what your mom's vagina goes through because of that penis
He's only giving you free adderall so you can focus on his dick.
First morning at school this semester and I threw up in a bush during my walk of shame.
Based on the conversation I'm going to assume you didn't close the deal.
It started going awry when I fell through a roof.
Even if they did assume we were doing kinky shit, it's not like they're gonna be like, "HALT SATAN! INTAKE SOME JESUS AND VOMIT YOUR SINS!"
Randomize
