just woke up and my boobs have "fun police" written on them
hey is it cool if i invite some fat girls to the party so i can be the skinny one?
yeah okay. but if i take one home with me you have to come over in the morning and tell her to get her shit and go.
Oh no, it isn't official until she poops.
while we were dancing I voluntarily took my bra off and hung it around his neck as a necklace. 2011 lets go
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All the girls at the party had American flag thongs on... Pretty impressed with coordination seeing as how impromptu this event was
i think he was starting go for a boob grab when we both realized the middle of a public tennis court wasn't the place
I tried to get you something for Valentine's Day too but they said they couldn't deliver skittles and ecstasy :(
IF I CAN STICK YOUR DICK IN MY MOUTH, I CAN STICK MY GUM ON YOUR NIGHTSTAND.
I'm pretty sure my liver died in Reno and my intestines are doing hula hoops around my asshole. The bachelor party was that good.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
2012 needs to end already. I've exceeded my quota for People Who Have Accidentally Seen My Tits.
Exactly. Stay back and unsubscribe from her
I've given up on the male species, I'm just going to be a lonely whore for the rest of my life.
My sinuses still burn from snorting red wine last night.
whose shirt was i wearing?
his little sister's
what was she wearing
a feather boa and 6 inch heels
He doesn't understand the concept of a strip club. He keeps falling in love
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