this just has baby written all over it
Pretty sure that this text will cost me like $5 but just wanted you to know that I just smoked a bowl of kush, about to walk around shopping for hookers and i get 3 credit hours for this study abroad .... have fun studying for finals.
Dude, at this rate we're going to get arrested a second time tonight.
they pretty much knew i was there to get drunk and fuck their daughter
friends don't put videos of other friends on youtube puking on their professor on the first day
It's a piss down the stairs of the hotel kind of night
my heart is telling me chinese, but my head is telling me beer.
I'm glad that even though we are states apart our whorish hearts beat as one
I need a nap, Harry Potter movies, and dick in this exact order after work.
the worst fight me and my gf ever had was over Guy fieri
He wore the same cologne as my orthodontist so all I could think about was how I hadn't worn my retainer in months
Yeah you'd pretty much be ruined if you broke up with a guy like that and then had to return to the dating pool
The body is still out there. I don't think my trainer realized when he asked me not to drink for 24 days, how often I see dead people
Hope you are okay. You were running down the street with shopping cart at one point and yelling "bitches aint shit!"
I think I was just recruited to join a religious lesbian cult by these 3 really pretty girls and I'm tempted to join
Randomize
