you guys were way drunker than both of me
Steve is enlightening me on how and why u put gerbils up your ass
Don't judge me. Haven't eaten all day so I'm in my room sticking my finger in peanut butter, then jam, then my mouth.
if pee wee herman would have taken a snuggie to the movies he wouldnt have gotten caught
his mom and I have the same butterfly tramp stamp. don't ask how that came up
let's get a trip to cabo together for next spring... they have to have forgotten about me by now
I think the pivotal moment was when we used the see and say as a drinking game with shots of whiskey. It was all downhill after that.
it was a frathouse cornucopia of foul mixed drinks and "sangria", which im convinced was blood and pcp
The face that yo gabba gabba comes up when I'm stoned and searching for yoga workouts is scary or dangerous
You lifted he top layer off his birthday cake and made it say 'eat me' in the cookie monster voice so yeah he knew.
What happened with the girl wasn't a gay thing. It was just a mutual respect and want for sex. The guys just weren't there.
Call it what you want. You fucked a girl.
Not sure. He doesn't know where New York is on a map but he gives an incredible spanking.
Who cares about New York?
Remember last NYE when after the 9th shot of tequila you went on full crazy mode and made out with the 50 y/o doorkeeper? and he called you the next day?
'allo, good sire. how dost thy day goeth?
oh no. you're at that weird Renaissance Festival thing again, aren't you?
I am an inebriated elf. you may fucketh off.
So turns out my new assistant isn't really my assistant. The owner needed a title for his FWB so his wife wouldn't catch on. I got a three hundred a month credit limit boost on my corporate credit card instead.
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