so they made cookies with their faces printed on them...I ate jaime...she tasted like poop
I just answered "If only I knew" for a quiz in criminology, she loved it. I got an A
That girl you went home with last night was dressed in a bright blue sweats at the bar. 205lb Smurffete FTL. Boy were you in epic form.
She definitely pulled a diaper out of her purse and cleaned up the vodka with it, where do you meet these people?!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We couldn't get our shit together to go to the bar, so we're getting drunk and facebook stalking all the girls who have gotten fat since high school. Any names you wanna throw out?
He probably smells like baby powder and sexual identity crisis.
It's called the eyeliner-blowjob correlation, read a science book bro
How can I not totally like a guy that told me my boobs were too big for me to be taught how to play golf?
Full contact beer pong was definitely not my best idea.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I have a physical this friday. On a scale from 1-10, 10 being the most judgemental gay bashing, how much judgement am I gonna get from my dr when he checks my balls and sees the cherry tattoo
I was afraid someone would drug test my pants so you set them on fire.
Smoking a bowl in nothing but a flamingo thong.
sexting while watching Peter Pan the Musical! something just doesn't seem right here
I don't know why I bit your face last night but I'm sorry .
We probably are going to die. So. Thanks for agreeing to be my Maid of Honor even though I torture you.
Randomize