Do you have a straightener and are extra lubricated condoms not the norm?
it's not the walk of shame if you do it in cowboy boots.
I think i just got paid for sex with a hot pocket... and i accepted
they bet me shots that I couldn't give people piggyback rides around the club just cause I'm 125lbs and a girl...I had a line forming after the third guy.
I want to hump her dimples until her face caves in.
So many issues. You honestly need help.
Tis the season to puke in grandma's bathroom
Hey. I can't work your space dryer so I'm wearing your blanket home. I'll get my clothes later. Fun party!
Shit dude that sort of wholesale destruction can't just be done at the drop of a hat
I told this guy in the dining hall that he's a hippie god and he's never made eating yogurt so sexy
So I got drunk last night and attempted to shave a landing strip on my vag. I now have a 8 lane highway on my crotch now. Just looks like a random ass square.
I thought it was pretty weird, but after the marinating loins thing, i figured i'd roll with it.
Can you please explain to me why there are 7 bags of tacos in my bed?
okay, but you can't tell anyone. Every time he instagrams something with the caption "avocado," it means he's booty calling me. Happy?
He was telling me how he was trying to grow up. And then 2 minutes later, he told me he was tripping on lsd for the first time.
Apparently I’m a terrible influence when alcohol is involved
Randomize
