The shirt is mine, the pants are mine, the bra not so much
I can't believe you let me try to pierce your nipple with a dart last night
i'm watching the tyra show: "women who beat up their boyfriends" - lets see how she can make THIS one all about herself too.
we're ranked number 5 for having the most pot in the country for a university school. idk if i should feel worried or just plain blessed.
He's doing the single life. He recently finished like a 3 year relationship. You can't date him.
But I don't want to date him. I just want to look at him. Naked. And in my bed.
so thats a no on the drunken crutches race 2moro
I'm trying to have a "pick me up from my house so I can get completely annihilated night" any takers? Cmon people this is what friends are for
I was told my cock was a religious experience.
Possibly having a threesome with my ex boyfriend and his current girlfriend was great closure on that subject
Am I just high or is she having an auction for her vagina on Twitter
Tell me again why we had to Facebook stalk your therapist?
Can't we just go back to fucking and having your boyfriend think you're completely straight?
We were too tired to finish having sex so we just stopped to eat the cheesecake and passed out. I didn't mind
Did I fall last night?
I wouldn't call it falling as much as you tried to lay on the sidewalk and proceeded to hit it face first.
What does "mood AF" mean?
Mood as fuck.
Why did you comment that on a video of a gorilla throwing its own shit?
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