ya ever know whats down there. always send some fingers in first to scout the situation. fingers are not used for pleasure. they're used for covert missions.
i wish that high-me and normal-me were two different ppl so that high-me could thank normal-me for setting out a feast before smoking
I wish that high-you wouldn't text me stupid shit at 3:30 in the morning
I'm graduating. Then you'll never see me again.
We better fuck soon then
I should do something nice for her. Like sign her up for "What Not To Wear."
omg theres cum all over the american flag and now its up in front of his house.
For some reason i am carrying prostate cancer brochures. i am nor used to drinking this early.
He managed to scream "cowabunga bitch" before he went down on me. Let me know if you still like him.
Now that I'm hitting my bong, I realized I haven't missed something so much in a long time. I love Thomas the Dank Engine.
I literally told her "she's a sandwich I'd like to make" and that's all it took
Pregnancy test = positive. Hope you still have our old guess who game 'cause daddy elimination begins now.
You know you're too high when you find yourself crying at " hand in my pocket" by Alanis Morissette because it's "just TOO REAL"
He ate a Doritos taco from my boobs. Does your boyfriend do that?
We hooked up last night. I think it was great for our friendship.
It's like fucking tetris in this bed
just because i'm not a monk anymore doesn't mean I need to tell you about my new sex life.
which is fantastic by the way.
Randomize
