I don't think your that much of a whore. your like a whore-let. a mini whore.
Going to spend my cab money on more shots and just take the ambulance home
i told my doctor i had 3 partners and one unprotected.. shes a cute little indian lady i couldnt break her heart
Her father's a cardiologist, her mom's a lawyer...she just went from a 5 to a 10 real quick.
he even offered to make my bed in the morning.
Obama is so hot when he ends wars.
It's very clear that i'm the girl sweating out four lokos at 2 in the afternoon at the gym
As punishment for throwing up on my car, I am holding your phone hostage until the morning. You can read this message after I drop it off.
He came home all fucked up crying slammed his bedroom door and all we could hear for about three hours was THIS ISN'T GONA RUIN MYLIFe what happend
I told him I got this chick pregnant and he has to get a new wingman
It would be like a dance party with a dick inside you. I think that's what Ke$ha wants for the world.
It was an "I snuck in through the window at 5am with my underwear in my pocket" kind of night.
I feel like I'm in a development meeting for a Lifetime original movie.
Immediately after sex he layed on the floor and acted like my yellow bra was pac man
I'm sitting alone in a bar pretending to watch football because I don't know where the liquor store is around here and I'll be god damned I'm going to be sober on my day off.
For the love of all that is holy just take the tranquilizers Erica
Randomize
