remember the good old days of high school when a half gal would last for more than a nite
You put a nerf gun to his head and demanded him to take you to taco bell..
There were 4 naked women demanding my presence. Of COURSE I got into the pool.
You broke a cabinet. You were climbing up it and it collapsed on you. Lines were crossed.
I'm sitting in the corner at the bar with a poolstick in case a brawl breaks out. Some crazy shit is going down and I'm trying to show my feathers like a horny peacock.
It's like a new game! Find out if he's circumcised without actually seeing it
I told him he was probably the first guy to get fucked while wearing Star Wars pyjamas.
It sucks laughing and vomiting at the same time, trust me. I kind of remember
Seriously, I look like I crawled out of a bog. Succeeding at being as undateable as possible.
Oh man 11pm. That means it's time to take my shirt off an eat a brownie
Guy pissing in the corner in downtown Boston as his girlfriend is covering him up, yelling "relationship goals"
the day i stop sending you hentai screenshots is the day i actually act like an adult, and TRUST ME. THAT AINT HAPPENING ANYTIME SOON.
I've Ubered to the bar three times this weekend to get my car but every time I get there I end up drinking. Still no car.
If you were to to ask if I just hid 4 shooters or Jameson it my bra and panties the anwer would be yes, yes I did
you asked if you could borrow my vagina for the night
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