I was just curling my hair topless and I just burned my nipple. Ouch.
You just left with that feminine looking guy you kept calling "Jessica." Just giving the heads up.
I am SOOO high
tell me about your high
HUGE THUMBTACKS
Our cab driver just admitted to beating up kids in the 60's who didn't smoke pot...
1. They have gold fish races every wednesday. 2. They have a redbull vodka slushie. We need to visit this place.
1. My fish will beat your fish. 2. Were getting fucked up
I may or may not have shit out a layer of my liver after that weekend.
S.O.S. he's talking about horses and breast feeding.
there is nothing ok with the fact that that was the 4th time i peed in the same parking ramp
Well. I guess talking about me stealing your wife may not be in the list of legit conversations
Can I come take down that wallpaper yet? I stopped seeing that dude and I need to occupy my time with something besides getting drunk at bingo night and cussing out old people. Also, i'm not sure on the legal stipulations but I might have, unintentionally, committed grand theft auto at some point.
bought even stevens on dvd and enough weed and pizza bagels to last us a week.. ready to get snowed in?
I just wanna inform you guys that the first pregnancy scare of 2016 is over...
WHY DOES MY BOYFRIEND'S BROTHER HAVE TO BE SO FUCKING HOT
Is it just me or is it like a girl gets married and all of a sudden she’s a “blogger”?
dude, there is no doorman in your lobby and the front door is locked
oh yeah, sorry he's up here at the party. coming now
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