Texts From Last Night

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  (510): View more from California

  my brain is sober enough to have a conversation.. but my arms feel nice

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  (510): my brain is sober enough to have a conversation.. but my arms feel nice http://tfl.nu/x5d6
  Replies (4) Good night (1712) Bad night (387) Order T-Shirt
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  (609): View more from New Jersey

  ive been sending my husband naked pics of my whole body from my phone..its a work phone. do you think our boss can see? if so, im either getting fired, or a raise.

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  (609): ive been sending my husband naked pics of my whole body from my phone..its a work phone. do you think our boss can see? if so, im either getting fired, or a raise. http://tfl.nu/slpx
  Replies (13) Good night (2658) Bad night (410)
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  (248): View more from Michigan

  Yeah, but I'm out of licorice and there's no way anywhere near here will rent us all mopeds on a Tuesday night.

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  (248): Yeah, but I'm out of licorice and there's no way anywhere near here will rent us all mopeds on a Tuesday night. http://tfl.nu/k6rq
  Replies (32) Good night (4207) Bad night (715) Order T-Shirt
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  (540): View more from Virginia

  I managed to convince my mom that my hickey was a birth mark I have always had. She cried for an hour about being a terrible mother for never noticing it.

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  (540): I managed to convince my mom that my hickey was a birth mark I have always had. She cried for an hour about being a terrible mother for never noticing it. http://tfl.nu/dv65
  Replies (45) Good night (10823) Bad night (2457)
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  (917): View more from New York City

  I told her i was enlisting in the air force tomorrow.....it was like the activation code to her vagina

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  (917): I told her i was enlisting in the air force tomorrow.....it was like the activation code to her vagina http://tfl.nu/sexo
  Replies (71) Good night (6591) Bad night (763) Order T-Shirt
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  (517): View more from Michigan

  My own mom unfriended me on Facebook.

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  (517): My own mom unfriended me on Facebook. http://tfl.nu/a468
  Replies (68) Good night (3735) Bad night (11294) Order T-Shirt
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  (206): View more from Washington

  weed brownie and a latte, breakfast of champions

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  (206): weed brownie and a latte, breakfast of champions http://tfl.nu/qwf5
  Replies (12) Good night (5442) Bad night (839) Order T-Shirt
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  (804): View more from Virginia

  there are 10 yearolds here who keep calling me on the elbow rule!

  (1-804): View more from Virginia

  Wait are they playing beer pong to?

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  (804): there are 10 yearolds here who keep calling me on the elbow rule! (1-804): Wait are they playing beer pong to? http://tfl.nu/dq3n
  Replies (13) Good night (4575) Bad night (990) Order T-Shirt
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  (412): View more from Pennsylvania

  At what point in my life was I not hugged enough to be on my fourth walk of shame in half as many weeks?

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  (412): At what point in my life was I not hugged enough to be on my fourth walk of shame in half as many weeks? http://tfl.nu/fbfw
  Replies (8) Good night (1157) Bad night (2728) Order T-Shirt
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  (516): View more from New York

  oh, so if i go friday and she's there, you are going to be my sponsor for not banging the crazy chick

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  (516): oh, so if i go friday and she's there, you are going to be my sponsor for not banging the crazy chick http://tfl.nu/bh3i
  Replies (5) Good night (845) Bad night (382) Order T-Shirt
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  (619): View more from California

  My Grandma made me promise not to drink more beer, so I'm chugging wine.

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  (619): My Grandma made me promise not to drink more beer, so I'm chugging wine. http://tfl.nu/2kaz
  Replies (5) Good night (1271) Bad night (375) Order T-Shirt
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  (815): View more from Illinois

  if I open my eyes, my head will explode. that hungover.

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  (815): if I open my eyes, my head will explode. that hungover. http://tfl.nu/myhj
  Replies (2) Good night (573) Bad night (412) Order T-Shirt
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  (203): View more from Connecticut

  At the drs she looked at my back saw your scratch marks and asked "does your back itch a lot?"

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  (203): At the drs she looked at my back saw your scratch marks and asked "does your back itch a lot?" http://tfl.nu/4r68
  Replies (5) Good night (1536) Bad night (287) Order T-Shirt
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  (+44): View more from United Kingdom

  Seeing Grandma lick chocolate sauce off of the male stripper was definitely not the way I planned to enter the world of legal drinking.

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  (+44): Seeing Grandma lick chocolate sauce off of the male stripper was definitely not the way I planned to enter the world of legal drinking. http://tfl.nu/zbnj
  Replies (6) Good night (888) Bad night (651) Order T-Shirt
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  (407): View more from Florida

  He fucks like those drill things that you see when you think of texas

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  (407): He fucks like those drill things that you see when you think of texas http://tfl.nu/zvf4
  Replies (10) Good night (206) Bad night (410) Order T-Shirt

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