I'll buy you a vibrator, we can get married for tax benefits, and live happily ever after with lots of doggggs.
I have show me your genitals stuck in my head. Except in spanish. Muestrame tus genitals. Tus genitals.
you did pass out in the elevator last night, so it could be motion sickness
I've been watching too much manswers. Cuz i know scissoring doesn't work on a motorcycle.
These 33 Eskimo Brothers Boinked The Same Person And Couldn’t Be More Proud
And for 6 straight hours, I laid on my bedroom floor trying to convince myself it would perfectly acceptable to pee on my own floor
dont get me wrong, i like when a guy is into my boobs but when he started saying mama i want milk let me suck, i gathered my shit together and bounced.
I don't think you'd be able to understand Inception if you weren't high...
Just tried to use the bottle of Sprite in my car as mouthwash to get the taste of puke out of my mouth- it's half vodka. Puked again. Thanks man.
Definately going to wake up wondering what happened to the other half of my lip.
17 Inappropriate Things People Did With Instruments
apparently it's a turnoff if you ask a guy why he thinks he needs to use magnums
HOLY FUCK I JUST GOT WOKEN UP BY THUNDER!!!!!
I THINK I SHARTED
The fun I thought I would be having now when I was six is vastly different from what I am currently doing. Hurraaay sex and vicodin.
I made out with a dude last night who has an ex wife. Is this what post grad life is about?
I choose McDonald's breakfast at 1:28am over sex anytime
I used an explanation of Walking Marriages in the Mosuo Culture to successfully negotiate an open relationship. That Anthropology degree is finally starting to pay off.