I wasn't pimping you out... I was helping you network!
writing the newer testament. It's the 3rd for the series. I'll update u the rule changes later.
You know what sound is wonderful for a hangover? Listening to the horns from the South Africans at the world cup
The guys had to come into the bar bathroom and pep talk us all off the floor
She was puking in a plastic bag while cleaning where she puked on the floor. She knows how to multitask.
I drove your lawn mower home. Hope you don't need it tonight. I'll bring it over tomorrow.
I may or may not have shit out a layer of my liver after that weekend.
I literally told her "she's a sandwich I'd like to make" and that's all it took
They just showed up to the party with a shopping cart full stolen of naty ice cans, no boxes, just cans. Shit just got real !
And that's the fourth pair of yoga pants with unwashable stains from you.
I doubt she'll sponsor it. You know alcohol and fireworks don't mix, right?
It's okay. We're not going to soak the fireworks in alcohol. The alcohol is for drinking.
Things I Learned Tonight: I have no future in goat wrangling. Herding. Whatever you call the ridiculosity that just transpired.
Dry heaving on campus is my new low. Also, go pats
Saw the Peanut butter guy at checkout he had at least 30 containers of it and like 6 different kinds...
Dude, fuck these noisy kids, fuck all this light, and fuck you for getting to sleep while I have to be productive and hungover.
Randomize
