It was as awful as eating cow testicles on fear factor and not winning and realizing you ate balls for nothing.
i walked into the party and i guess everyone knew because they began to chant "ass to mouth"
he came and i only had my diet coke to rinse.. can you say coke float?
I decided that just having that story under my belt and being able to tell it to my grandchildren is worth the regrets of the evening.
I dont even clean my room anymore .. i drunk proof it for when i come back smashed with a guy
They're like penises that have been put in a blender.
My boyfriend just sent me flowers. I am now crying at the fact i fucked my fat neighbor. God please help me.
Most likely. calling 911 isnt usually something i do the first time i hang out w. someone, but hey. its a good story now.
Did a bunch of gravity bongs and am watched hours of Frozen Planet. There is nothing in the world I want more than to hug a polar bear.
And I might get them triple pierced after that
Damn, I didn't realize you'd declared war on airport metal detectors
Not my type. One of those types that loves that they're educated, could drink their red wine and have an intellectual conversation and have a wonderful time
An adult?
I'm wearing a suit and have no chance of getting laid or robing a casino. I consider this opportunity a failure
Sounds like either a very good Friday night or a very bad Saturday morning.
The doctor basically called me a dirty dick.
So many questions so I’ll prioritize. How did I survive last night?
Randomize
