Letd wlk him
Lrtd walek hime
Lets wlk home,,,ther we go
What's the procedure for failed threesomes? Do I friend her on facebook this morning?
Why is there a living, breathing cow on your front porch?
I call biggest shit show at the party. I welcome all challengers.
He just made me a heart out of cocaine... i think i'm in love
Just think, if your stepsister would've gotten knocked up 2 years earlier, she could've had a TV show. What a bitch.
I needed a test subject that didn't know any of my friends so that if i screwed up no one would really know or spread rumours about how it was the worst bj ever
I had to physically pry the rocks out of your hands so you wouldn't throw them at the guy with the cowboy hat. You probably would've missed anyways.
He told me his cum shot melted the paint on his bedroom wall and asked if I want to see it
He's against "violent sex" cause apparently my body is "sacred". Like dude I'm about to tell you about blowing your brother just so you'll fuck me like an animal Jesus Christ....
Is it bad that I recognize every dick in your dic pic collection?
Trust me, dating 38 and 20 year old dudes at the same time is the best. Money plus all of the sex. Finally figured out this relationship thing.
Statistics show that guys with slightly higher IQ scores and overly-trimmed eyebrows have micro penises. It's science.
Afternoon delight is playing while I take a shit at mcdonalds
I don't know how much expertise I could offer. My best advice is, "don't drown, for god's sake don't drown"
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