Yeah and Nick is shooting his loaded 9mm in his backyard.
I was just curling my hair topless and I just burned my nipple. Ouch.
I'm almost 25, which means I can ride with girls that have permits
well, tey weren't taking lap dances as payment today
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
FYI: if you have sex in your room with the light on, we can totally see your shadows from the parking lot
Your boyfriend has good rhythm though.
I denied three guys and puked everywhere because I love you.
I hope your perfect outfit is a slutty power rangers outfit. That's been my dream wedding since I was a kid.
You were a path of destruction, you started with eating half the cake, proceeded by throwing the rest in the sink and dumping water all over it while laughing... then throwing the drunk helmet across the room yelling that you didnt want to wear it... i'd say it was a successful birthday.
Ur dog was like a damn middle school chaperone this morning trying to lay between us after what he saw us do last night
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
im going to hold it over his head for all of eternity. when his children are born i am going to go to the hospital as his wife is giving birth and shove the picture in the childs face, so the first time they see their father is in a drunken stupor looking like a jackass.
I feel like I grabbed someones dick last night, & if I didn't I'll be disappointed in myself
We were having sex in the gardens when the grounds keeper walked up on us. He gave me a thumbs up and walked away
Went home with a dude from UF last night. Just dripped chicken onto my phone and then licked it off. Going to pick up a bridesmaid dress. Mid 20s in a nutshell.
just once i'd like to actually BE there for your crazy drunk stories instead of just getting the play-by-play by people who can't remember half of it
Its almost 1 am and u wanna get together and cry naked
Randomize