i feel rough
just turned on the light, there is blood EVERYWHERE.
yeah for some reason your penis didn't fit in my mouth the other day
the reason why you were crawling on your hands and knees from room to room last night was because you thought the ceiling fans were chasing you...
that makes sense.
i regret nothing . he quoted dr. suess . he deserved that bj .
He's the equivalent of a body pillow and a dildo. But still funny. We have good pillow talk.
all i remember is him tryin to explain to the girls how to effectively hit the strip club with their bfs
hes actually pretty persuasive when he drinks
Nope. If I'm going to drive an hour to fuck a teacher, it will NOT be missionary thats for damn sure.
fun fact #6 about tuesday nights: giving head with two 40s taped to your hands is not as easy as you would think
Pizza toast. It's like pizza but on toast. BC we are broke. OMG its so good.
You would never do this sober.
I cried at the bouncer while saying I wished he was my father... They had no idea what to do with me.
We've been walking through the woods for two hours, he just keeps taking pictures. At least we'll remember this tomorrow.
i am laugh crying so hard the guy next door stopped playing guitar
On a scale of zero to "unmitigated disaster," how drunk is he?
tbh I think I just dated him for his dogs in the first place.
the day i stop sending you hentai screenshots is the day i actually act like an adult, and TRUST ME. THAT AINT HAPPENING ANYTIME SOON.
Randomize
