Dude, just got a bummer.
What??
A blow job from a homeless chick.
Apparently they want to see what I've been working on for the last three months. Can I just hand them a bunch of empty fifths?
you don't know how close you are to someone till they ask you to shave their ass.
The crowing achievement of my life is still the time I made a 3 course meal out of things I found in the dumpster.
imagine if we didn have a dick. we would be so much more productive
watching espn. realized that the exact place those sportcenter guys are is where I got laid on the beach last superbowl. my sex spot is broadcasted nationwide
theyre doing DJ Khaled impressions again...
I don't know. I was also picked up by the doormen and held over the bar so I could do an upside down shot out of a bartenders tits.
Zip lining have a big frozedn drink with 151 rum chippendale pic life is GREAT
just peed in rthe mens room but seranaeded them with adelle the whole timee so they didnt mind
When I woke up everyone at the party was in their underwear. Only you guys were playing strip pong.
Yes, we all have the power to convince a large amount of people to take their clothes off
I was Jaeger weird. I was rolling on the floor pretending to be an Olympic gymnast and my name was Gina
She was hammered and showed her gay best mate a pic of my cock, his response was "I fucked the wrong brother"
On a side note apparently my brother is gay
I just threw up in the bushes and my gardener started clapping...
how did i manage to wake up with my bra on backwards?
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